Tips: Survive Your Borderline Enchantress
Prof. Sam Vaknin Prof. Sam Vaknin
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 Published On May 4, 2021

DBT, mindfulness effective

Abandonment anxiety -- preemption

Rituals and procedures of presence, permanence, stability, and predictability

Object inconstancy ---identity disturbance (emptiness)

Mementos
Programmed reminders
Mantras

Decompensation

Techniques to tackle anxiety and panic (breathing, journaling and reading aloud)

Acting Out (Self states, secondary psychopathy): impulsivity and recklessness

Decatastrophizing
Mirroring
Techniques for impulse control (redirection, motivation, reframing)

Emotional dysregulation

Verbalizing
Labeling
Externalizing
Chair work (emotions in chair)/dialog
CBT negative thoughts

Anger management techniques

Cognitive restructuring
Communication protocols
Humor

Mood lability

Physical activity
Sleep schedule
Routines
Stress management techniques

Outsourcing of ego functions

Regain locus of control
Develop and reward autoplastic defenses

Idealization-devaluation

Restore reality testing
Maintain the entire picture (integrate splitting)

Self-mutilation, suicidality

Sexual self-trashing, substance abuse, and reckless behaviors as self-harm

Prevention first involves being able to recognize the warning signs of suicide, which can include:

• Extreme mood swings
• Feelings of hopelessness
• Giving away possessions
• Losing interest in activities
• Talking about death or suicide
• Saying goodbye to family and friends
• Saying that they are a burden
• Withdrawing from friends and family

Do not judge, dismiss, or discount feelings
Listen
Encourage verbalizing
sublimate aggression

Dissociation

Journaling
Mementos
video recordings
programmed reminders

Transient paranoid ideation (persecutory object)

Reality testing: journaling, counter-paranoia (questioning/doubting),
Secret code or exit strategy (suspend/freeze)

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