5 signs of emotional abuse

Emotional abuse can have a long-lasting damaging effect on your self-esteem and your self-worth. Some researchers and therapists say it's even more damaging than physical abuse and it usually comes with physical abuse. Now, how many of you know of an individual who is right now in an emotionally abusive relationship? Almost all of you know of someone, right? People need to know that this is very common. We see it sometimes within our parents, sometimes with siblings, sometimes in our own relationships or with friends.

Today, I’m going to share with you the five signs of being in an emotionally abusive relationship.

Being degraded:
Dominating:
Accusing or blaming:
Neglect:

In some cases, the spouse will get mad at them and many times, they won't even tell their spouse why they're upset. So it's a guessing game. The spouse will just feel like,

“Oh my God, what have I done?”

“What have I said, why are they so upset with me?”

“Why aren't they talking to me?”

This can happen at any moment. That is why many people who are in emotionally abusive relationships are constantly on an edge. They will describe their relationship as walking on eggshells. They don't know what's going to tick them off.

The abuser will punish you for not adhering to everything that they say or do. This can have a very long-lasting effect emotionally because when you feel that anything you say is going to end in an argument of the silent treatment, it makes you very scared. You will stop expressing yourself.

You will hold back your feelings, your needs, and your wants. This is not a healthy relationship. If you feel scared around your spouse, where you can't share your feelings, where you can't share what you need, where you can't share, then this can really have a long-lasting impact on you.


Codependence:

Can therapy help?

Some spouses who are being subjected to this kind of abuse would actually seek therapy hoping to save their relationship by changing themselves. But guess what? The spouse will respond to them differently. I like to describe the relationship as a kind of a chemical reaction.

If you have a chemical reaction and you change one substance, what's going to happen is completely different. Some substances will be combustible. Others will just have no reaction. So when you change yourself, you're changing the substance and the reaction will be different. Will your partner respond differently if you change yourself? Are they willing to learn? Are they willing to go through a marriage program? Are they willing to expand their mind and recognize that this is a toxic relationship?

If they are, then that's great. I've seen people genuinely make a change, but sometimes, the only solution could be the fear of divorce.

But if your partner refuses to acknowledge that they have a problem, and if you are continuously walking on eggshells, trying to manage their emotions, that person is never going to realize how damaging it is. They don't want to get help. This makes the victim completely depleted and vulnerable.

If you are in an abusive relationship, I want you to seek professional help. I have free training videos for a marriage that you can work on yourself. Make sure you're aware of your behavior. If you make certain changes, establish boundaries, establish self-esteem, and keep your tawakkul on Allah, but don’t stay silent or passive. You must take charge of your relationship and your life. You deserve to be at peace. You deserve to have a sense of tranquility in your life. You don't have to just live your life to manage another person's emotions.

Head over to the “Courses” category on this website and see which one works best for you to help you to regain your strength and your independence, and make you feel capable.