Until 2011, conscription was mandatory for German men, with the option to refuse armed service and do civil service at home or abroad instead. In 2009 at age 19, I chose to go abroad as part of a development aid program, hoping that I would have the opportunity to contribute meaningfully to a community. I went to Senegal for a one-year civil service assignment for a German nongovernmental organization that I picked from a list of options provided by a ministry’s website.

During my time with the organization, I grew increasingly disillusioned. I didn’t see a development project operating in the way it was described to the public. The sewing school was neglected, the cultural center where I lived was empty, and some donations from Germany disappeared or rotted away in containers. As part of my work, I was eventually asked to volunteer in a hospital in Thiès, which involved many duties that I was not properly trained or prepared for.

Almost 13 years later, I decided to make a film based on my memories, videos and photographs from Senegal, as well as a present-day interview with Madeleine, a friend I made during my time there. The result is this short documentary, which aims to examine the paradigm of foreign aid and volunteerism through the lens of my experiences.

- Film and Text by Paul Drey

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