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My good friend of many years texts me on day and says her son is going to take the train down from Los Angeles to San Diego. Oceanside in particular. Picked him up and took him about lots of San Diego, mostly along the coast. The coolest kid. Warm, gentle nature and a bright kid. Shared with him lots of anecdotal stories not just of my life, but also things I've read, music that moved me and that I've gotten into, the art world, humanitarian work, women, sex, religion, money, politics, gardening, cooking, horticulture, oceanography, photography, geography and more. One can fill in a lot of nooks and crannies in a conversation layered with laughter and clever dialogue. He had great stories to share with insightful interesting perspectives.
Young men need to hang out with many more older guys older non related who have walked lots of paths. Conversations that involve the huge splattering of topics where learning some hands on skills in communicating is a tool one needs to continually master throughout life. We must have spoken to a couple of dozen people on our path. Much of the concepts of our dialogues were new to him.
At one point, I took him to Mt. Soledad landmark which has a large concrete structured cross and many stone engraved placards of San Diego military personal. There's a 360 degree view of San Diego. We met a bunch of Afghani Muslims in traditional garb, engaged and chatted away. Only one spoke English but that's how it works. We work together. We said hello to the Caltrans workers, some young ladies sitting on a stone wall overlooking the ocean in Del Mar and more. He learned about many of the plant life in San Diego as we went about. I pointed out a great many things that I found lovely, beautiful or otherwise stood out.
It's important for language to come out of one's mouth. It's also very important to read and write daily, to look up new words in the dictionary, to read out loud anything you are reading and what you have actually written down yourself. We talked about outer presentation and how the world will find ways to judge you without knowing you. Breaking the ice in conversation often sets the tone in a new engagement with someone or a group. "Greetings Ms., Good afternoon Gentlemen, How do you do sir?" are not only great starters in convos that need not necessarily continue, but you set the tone with respect. Often people will respond in kind. Explained that women are often on guard with males they don't know and for good reason. So, a gentle non intrusive or abrasive greeting is in order. He has a lovely mom and grandmother in his life already, but expanding understanding of women is important. That there is a time and place to be skeptical and logical......and that is all the time.
There's something really important I feel needs to be shared and that is "one will continually learn and grow regardless of age, if you are curious and willing to explore". Examples: There are nearly 7,500 languages actively spoken in the world today, there are nearly 200 hundred sovereign countries in the world, there's more than 90,000 varieties of rice, 5,500 varieties of apples, 5,000 varieties of potatoes, 51,000+ pieces of art in the permanent collection of the San Diego Museum of Art, 574 native tribal bands the US acknowledges, 4,500 plus varieties of Milkweed and more and more and more and so on. All available to query and understand.
To better comprehend the future, we have to analyze history both modern and ancient. How religion, politics and economics have shaped societies, how social mores have evolved, how foods were introduced and spread throughout the world and so forth.
Importantly, how to be fascinated by all of it.
All of it.
ALL OF IT!