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Season 5 Episode 4

What makes for a loving relationship that lasts? For over 40 years Drs. John and Julie Gottman have devoted their life to the research and practice of fostering healthy, long-lasting relationships. Through studying thousands of couples, publishing over 200 academic articles, more than 40 books on the topic and co-founding the Gottman’s Institute, John and Julie have created interventions to change the way that couples relate to each other to help people succeed in the future of their relationships. In the conversation, John and Julie give me a masterclass in everything there is to know about building long lasting relationships, we cover the four key reasons why relationships fail, communication strategies, rituals to cultivate deeper connection and their latest book The Seven Day Love Prescription which distills their work into a seven-day action plan for deeper intimacy. Enjoy :)

00:00 Intro
02:06 Why do we need research about love and relationships?
04:37 Research methodology for analysing couples
06:42 What are the things that predict a relationship will be happy?
07:52 The 4 reasons why relationships fail
16:04 Strategies to overcome anger
18:35 What can people do to overcome conflict in relationships
24:30 Why logic vs emotion is a false dichotomy
33:10 Common mistakes men make in relationships
38:12 Your research into LGBTQ+ relationships
40:18 The biggest difference between men and women in relationships
43:40 Decision making in relationships
48:01 Rituals of connection
51:01 Relationship reviews
56:35 What is the function of marriage?
01:07:31 Is there an ideal age gap?
01:10:44 Relationships therapy and pre-commitment counselling
01:14:12 The love prescription formula
01:26:06 Book writing

🔗 CONNECT WITH JOHN & JULIE

📕 The Seven Day Love Prescription - https://geni.us/2p6rV0C
📱 The Gottman Card Decks App - https://www.gottman.com/couples/apps/
💻 Website - https://www.gottman.com/
🐦 Twitter -   / gottmaninst  
📸 Instagram -   / gottmaninstitute  
🎥 YouTube Channel - @TheGottmanInstitute

🔗 CONNECT WITH ALI

🎥 YouTube Channel - @aliabdaal
🐦 Twitter -   / aliabdaal  
📸 Instagram -   / aliabdaal  
💻 Website - https://aliabdaal.com
👥 Linkedin -   / ali-abdaal  

📚 RESOURCES MENTIONED
A Two Factor Method For Predicting When A Couple Will Divorve - Dr John Gottman and Prof Robert Levinson - https://bit.ly/3XzR7Oy
The Man's Guide To Women by Drs John & Julie Gottman - https://geni.us/lPHQxS
Processing A Regrettable Incident Booklet - https://bit.ly/3xnEcnY
How To not die alone by Logan Ury - https://geni.us/el85
The Eight Conversations That Matter Most In Relationships - https://bit.ly/2EkBWlG
Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski - https://geni.us/A2PU

📄SHOW NOTES & TRANSCRIPT

Visit the website for the transcript and highlights from the conversation - https://aliabdaal.com/podcast/

🎙 ABOUT THE PODCAST

Deep Dive is the podcast that delves into the minds of entrepreneurs, creators and other inspiring people to uncover the philosophies, strategies and tools that help us live happier, healthier and more productive lives.

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👋🏼 GET IN TOUCH

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