This was one of the hardest videos I have even made. It took me a bit of time to wrap my head around the fact that we had a miscarriage this month.

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To make a long story short at just about 9 weeks gestation… we lost our baby having a miscarriage. I knew what was happening, and the worst part was knowing it was 100% out of my control. I was losing the tiny heart that was beating inside me...that we saw beating just last week. We were losing a future with this little life...all of the dreams we had for this little soul inside me. We called the doctor & the soonest appointment was the next day. The Ultrasound confirmed & the grief had completely taken over. It comes in waves. I feel...numb ...empty ...sad ...guilty ...confused.
And then I look at Cole & through this experience, I have Thanked God more than you know for how blessed we were to have a healthy pregnancy & a thriving little boy to hold tightly in our arms. But that aside… you just don't know how it feels, unless you are a part of this absolutely dreadful, worst club in the world.
The biggest thing that is helping me through this is reading other women's stories. I can’t even find the words to correctly say how I feel, but reading how others feel, agreeing & trying to tell myself that I’m not crazy & sharing this here right now…This is me trying to cope. And Thank you to everyone for being my support system.

Our other weekly pregnancy VLOGS can be found here.
Baby Formula Taste Test -    • Baby Formula vs BreastMilk Taste Test...  
Birth Vlog Part 1(C-section)- https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFhq9...
Birth Vlog Part 2(Postpartum recovery) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=i5CET...
• Pregnancy announcement -    • Pregnancy Announcement - Telling my H...  
• WEEK 4 -    • 4 WEEKS PREGNANT - Early signs & Symp...  
• WEEK 5 -    • 5 WEEKS PREGNANT - Cravings, Symptoms...  
• WEEK 6 -    • 6 WEEKS PREGNANT - My Symptoms, Emoti...  
• WEEK 7 -    • 7 WEEKS PREGNANT - Our 1st Appointmen...  
• First Prenatal Appointment -    • WEEK 7- First Prenatal Appointment Q & A  
• WEEK 8 -    • 8 WEEKS PREGNANT - Cravings, Symptoms...  
• WEEK 8 Again? -    • WE'RE AT 8 WEEKS PREGNANT AGAIN? Firs...  
• WEEK 9 -    • 9 Weeks Pregnant // We found the hear...  
• First ULTRASOUND -    • Our FIRST ULTRASOUND 8 Weeks Pregnant...  
• WEEK 10 -    • 10 WEEKS PREGNANT -  IS THE BABY EVEN...  
• WEEK 12 -    • 12 WEEKS PREGNANT // 2nd Ultrasound w...  
• WEEK 13 -    • 13 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE //  Size and...  
• WEEK 14 -    • 14 WEEKS PREGNANT // Bursting into te...  
• GENDER REVEAL!!!! -    • BABY GENDER REVEAL SURPRISE!!! Egg Ro...  
• WEEK 15 -    • 15 WEEKS PREGNANT // The Headaches wo...  
• WEEK 16 -    • 16 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // Is This B...  
• WEEK 17 -    • 17 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // The Baby ...  
• WEEK 18 -    • 18 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // We Made a...  
• WEEK 19 -    • 19 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // First Chi...  
• WEEk 20 -    • 20 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // OMG HIS F...  
• WEEK 21 -    • 21 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE //  New Body...  
• WEEK 22 - https://amzn.to/2MF4VDn
• WEEK 23 -    • 23 WEEKS PREGNANCY UPDATE // Nursing ...  
• WEEK 24 -    • 24 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // First Mot...  
• WEEK 25 -    • 25 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // Belly but...  
• WEEK 26 -    • 26 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // Belly Lau...  
• WEEK 27 -    • 27 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // Painted N...  
• WEEK 28 -    • 28 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE //  BLEEDING...  
• WEEK 29 -    • 29 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE //  Crazy Be...  
• WEEK 30 -    • 30 WEEK PREGNANT UPDATE // Acid Reflu...  
• WEEK 31 -    • 31 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // Diastasis...  
• WEEK 32 -    • 32 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // Baby is B...  
• WEEK 33 -    • 33 WEEKS PREGNANT UPDATE // Am I Depr...  
• WEEK 34 -    • 34 WEEKS PREGNANT // Did Our Breech B...  
• WEEK 35 -    • 35 WEEKS PREGNANT //  Breech Baby, Bo...  
• WEEK 36 -    • 36 WEEKS PREGNANT // ECV Procedure & ...  
• WEEK 37 -    • 37 WEEKS PREGNANT // Scheduled C Sect...  
• WEEK 38-39 -    • 38 & 39 WEEKS PREGNANT - OUR LAST VID...